Posted in Mental Health

Anxiety & Me: How I Get Through

Possible Trigger Warning: There will be talk about my personal experience with anxiety and PTSD.

If you have anxiety, you understand how difficult it is to manage. Most of the time, I can manage, but sometimes I can’t, but I am finally at a stage where I can usually get through it. I wanted to share how I get through bouts of anxiety attacks, and hopefully it may help someone struggling.

Being Observant: It took me a long time to figure out what triggers my anxiety. Paying attention to the events that happen before an anxiety attack will help you identify what causes the attack. For me, Walmart is a huge trigger. I can’t even drive to the parking lot of Walmart alone (at least in my hometown, but I prefer not to shop at any Walmart for many reasons now). This is because I experienced trauma by two people who used to work there as a young teenager, and on a trip exploring the superstore walking alone, I WALKED PAST the one person I never wanted to see again or know existed in the public in my entire life. My lizard brain does not want to deal with that ever again, so it gets heated at the thought of even entering the parking lot in an attempt to protect me. Understanding the trigger to an anxiety attack is very helpful in the self-talk needed to get through an anxiety attack in a shorter amount of time.

Quiet Spaces: Finding a quiet space at the onset of an anxiety attack is really important for me to focus on grounding myself. I’m not picky about it though, because there are no perfect places when in the midst of an anxiety attack. Bathroom stalls, inside my car, my walk-in closet, or going outside if indoors– these are all quiet spaces I’ve gone to when I experience the beginning of an anxiety attack. It just needs to be a space where I can hear myself think.

Self-Compassion: I think this is the most important. I know I tend to be harsh on myself, and getting frustrated when having anxiety only causes more stress and exacerbates the issue. When you are having an anxiety attack, it is very important that you are giving yourself the care and compassion you deserve. So make self-compassion part of your self-care routine. Currently, I really am enjoying working on self-compassion with The Power of Self-Compassion by Laurie J. Cameron. It’s a fantastic audio book from Audible (not sponsored). Granting yourself the compassion you would to a best friend (or for me, a beloved student) is so important to get you through times of anxiety.

Talk Therapy: Get yourself some healthy coping mechanisms through therapy. Get someone objective to talk to that wants to help you be your best self. Unfortunately, partners don’t count, as usually they are not licensed professionals to help you get the tools you need. Through talk therapy though, you can get some tools to help your partner become even more amazing and supportive (if you have one). During this pandemic, I have found BetterHelp (not sponsored) to be a great option to have access to someone to talk to, and they are very good about helping with affordability.

Medication: Even with everything I do to get through anxiety, I was having a very difficult time last year and was consistently having anxiety attacks far too often for me to live my life. Even with all of my coping skills. At that time, it is important to discuss with a doctor about what has been going on and let them know everything you have done to get through it. Often, they will give a questionnaire and discuss medication options that fit with your lifestyle. To me, medication isn’t a bad thing. It’s like wearing glasses to help you see better. I also requested to get additional blood work done to check my thyroid levels, as I know my family has a history of Hashimoto’s hypothyroidism, and it finally showed up for me, after many checks throughout high school and college. An underactive thyroid affects the brain’s ability to function properly, and for me, it caused intense anxiety. So, now I am taking medication for my thyroid and medication for anxiety, but with the work I am doing to be as healthy as possible, I may not need the anxiety medication much longer as my thyroid has help functioning properly.

So, those are some of the things I find helps me get through my anxiety. Some days are better than others, but overall, I am having fewer anxiety attacks, and have been able to get to the end of an anxiety attack in a shorter amount of time. I think the amount of natural light I’ve been getting in our new house has also been beneficial for my mental health. If you’re struggling, I really hope these ideas may help you find peace and clarity. Let me know what works for you!

Stay healthy, y’all.

Sincerely,

Babbles&brains

Posted in Mental Health

Uh, Hello. Again.

My work-from-home setup and my coworker, Juvia.

I’ve been having weekly panic attacks and am enjoying Animal Crossing New Horizons. Not related, unless its hunting for tarantulas.

I’ve been doing my best to take care of myself during this time. I’m really sad that our school buildings are closed for the rest of the school year, but I’ve been trying to meet with my students on Google Hangouts Meet just to see their faces and see if they’re doing okay (I’m skeptical about Zoom at the moment). I hate not being able to control things like going to work everyday and seeing my students, and not knowing what the future will look like. I hate the fact that our kids are being set behind in many ways, and I’m worried about how next school year will be.

When I was my students’ age, school saved my life. My education was a place of safety and something I had ownership of when I felt I had nothing and no control at home. I feel for my kids who find school to be a safe haven and are now stuck in situations they can’t get relief from.

I’ve been crying a lot. Panic attacks from feeling out of control of things, as well as hurting for students that might be hurting during this time, negative pregnancy tests… my brain likes to think I am a failure first.

It’s times like these where it is easy to feel defeated and powerless. However, brain, I am stronger and more powerful during these times. I care so much, and I can do things nobody thinks are possible because I care and do what it takes. I don’t give up when it comes to those I care deeply for.

I’ve been assigning enrichment activities that bring a little bit of brightness for my students. My 9th graders are making skits recreating the story of Pyramus and Thisbe (the OG Romeo & Juliet story). I’m excited to see how their one-man shows will turn out. My 8th graders are reviewing the Civil War through historic literature and speeches. My 7th graders are writing about a person who changed their life. For whoever can do them, it’s something to do. It’s something for me to do to show how much I care. It matters.

The best news to come out of this time is no state testing this school year. Though some funding may be tied to state testing, our kids don’t need that added stress in normal times, and we don’t need less time to teach them about things that truly matter, like relationships.

All this to say, I’ve been absent from writing because I have been working through anxiety and prepping for distant learning, and connecting with my best friend through Animal Crossing.

Readers, how are you really doing? Are you alright? If not, I hope you will be soon. Please wash your hands. Sanitize your devices. Practice self-compassion.

Talk to you soon,

Babbles&brains