Tag: babies

Posted in Trying to Become Parents Journey

Trying to Become Parents Part 16: The BEST News Ever & The worst news ever

Posted on by babbles&brains

It’s taken me ages to upload. So many things have happened since the last update to this journey. Good news and bad news.

I’ll start with a bit of good news. We did a transfer of our only male embryo. The two week wait and the hcg beta tests were so extremely nerve-wracking. I was so nervous that I wouldn’t have good news, but the numbers doubled, and then at the third beta test, the results skyrocketed to about 6 times over the expected doubling. Which should have indicated to me that we were dealing with multiples but I was just lucky to finally be pregnant and it really stuck in there.

The bad news is, I was carrying twins for about seven weeks. We found out when I was 6 weeks and some days that I was carrying two babies, strong heartbeats, similar in size. At our next monitoring check around week 8 and 3 days, one of them no longer had a heartbeat.

We had about two weeks to absorb the idea of having twins, and just started to get excited and call them “the boys” because we were pretty sure they were identical twins from our one embryo splitting into two. That’s a story for another day because our doctor is convinced it was from my ovulation as it showed signs of genetic abnormality (but we followed directions and didn’t have sex before or after transfer so how did it get there?!).

Vanishing twin syndrome is pretty common, but often missed with regular unassisted pregnancies. Since I’ve been monitored every two weeks, we saw it happen. It gave us a little bit of time to love another baby before it was gone, but still heartbreaking. I never expected to experience a pregnancy loss and my first pregnancy at the same time.

And that’s the good news. I am 9 weeks and 5 days today. Our baby boy that stayed earth-side is growing so well. We got to hear his heartbeat, he’s got fingers and toes, and he’s just perfect. We are going to be parents by April 30!

Our little embryo that could!

As much as we are saddened by the loss, we are so grateful that we still have a baby and that we still get to be parents. I’m trying to stay as positive as possible because our baby deserves the least amount of distress.

So, we’re pregnant. FINALLY!

Talk to you soon, Babbles&brains

Posted in Trying to Become Parents Journey

Trying to Become Parents Part 15: The Two Week Wait

Posted on by babbles&brains

So much has happened since the last time I posted. The PGT results came in and indicated that we had three genetically viable embryos, and we signed off on transferring one this month. Transfer day was August 12, 2022.

My sweet husband and I, very much ready for our first embryo transfer.

The transfer itself was very quick. The prep was not fun. Apparently I have a smaller bladder than normal people so that made things uncomfortable for a while. But it was done and it was a perfect transfer!

And now, we’re waiting for my beta test appointments. Four days left actually for when I get results. FOUR. DAYS.

I’ve never been this close to being pregnant before. I don’t know what I’m supposed to feel in my body with pregnancy, so I can’t really say with confidence that I am without more proof. I have the cutest picture of our embryo, but I’m not ready to share it until we get our official news.

I’ll update in four days!

Cautiously optimistic, babbles&brains

Posted in Trying to Become Parents Journey

Trying to Become Parents- Part 14: Cryo-babies!

Posted on by babbles&brains

After all this time, we have four embryos being biopsied and frozen.

This is next! AHHHH THIS IS NEXT.

I am over the moon excited we have such a good chance of being parents now. We’re so close!

Now we just have to wait for our pgt results and my body to rest to get ready for pregnancy.

From 21 eggs, we had 16 mature eggs, and 9 fertilized normally, and by day 5/6 we got four embryos growing properly enough to be PGT tested.

We haven’t completely decided quite yet because we will discuss the plans with our doctor and nurse, but we’re really hoping we can do two embryos at once this first egg transfer in mid-August. I don’t mind twins, though I know the goal is one healthy pregnancy at a time and multiples make it risky. But we also have to wait to see if our embryos have all the chromosomes they’re supposed to for a viable pregnancy. So our number of embryos could be smaller in about two weeks. I’m really hoping we continue receiving good news on our little ones.

Until next time,

Babbles&brains

Posted in Trying to Become Parents Journey

Trying to Become Parents Part 13: Cautious Eggscitement

Posted on by babbles&brains

So I’ve been doing the stimulation injections for 10 days and we’re so close to the egg retrieval! I trigger tonight and tomorrow morning and retrieval surgery is on Monday. It’s here. It’s really happening!

An illustrated example of what we hope to happen with all our eggs Monday!

I have 23 follicles growing steadily. I’m absolutely one to count eggs before they hatch. This is how my math works: 23 eggs that can get fertilized, they’re probably going to get about 20 eggs from the retrieval, about 1/3 of these eggs will get fertilized and grow to day 5 to get frozen. That means by Saturday, we will ideally get 6-7 embryos before they are tested for chromosome abnormalities.

I mean technically, it only takes one to take, but having our best chances for success would be ideal, and a few saved for multiple tries or a sibling later would be great. Regardless, I’ll be over the moon if we have just one embryo. That’s one possible baby I’d never have without IVF.

I’d really like to never have to do another egg retrieval though. It is very uncomfortable right now having ovaries the size of Meyer lemons. And it’s definitely out of our budget to do this again. #myteachersalaryisajoke

Anyway, wish us the best outcome! We’re so excited to finally start our family soon. Until next time,

Babbles&brains

Posted in Trying to Become Parents Journey

Trying to Become Parents Part 12: Shots Everybody

Posted on by babbles&brains

Today is day 5 of injections for stimulating my ovaries to grow as many follicles as possible for my body. I’m trying to stay hopeful while also trying not to think too much about what I can’t see right now. That part is going okay, I think.

This is just some of the injections and supplies. I have a whole pharmacy in my bathroom!

Tomorrow we start counting follicles and measuring their size. So the doctor can start figuring out how many eggs they can get.

Every night when my spouse helps me with the injections, I am still amazed that this is actually happening for us, that we are actually getting so much closer to starting our family.

I’m taking each day at a time, trying to fill each day with something enjoyable. We have just about a week left before the big retrieval day. Already! I’m so nervous but I’m doing everything I can to be as healthy and ready as possible.

Until next time,

Babbles&brains

Posted in Trying to Become Parents Journey

Trying to Become Parents part 8: Third time is the… Fail.

Posted on by babbles&brains

Whatever happened this time, I blame my left ovary. Darn lefty!

To summarize, I did not do a third IUI, but I did take medication. The doctors noticed that my follicles were not growing at the pace expected from the femara I was taking. So, we had two options: injectables to see if we can get my follicles to grow enough to do an IUI, or just wait til next round and increase the dose of femara.

I talked with the doctor at length this time around. It’s so tough to do all the things and hope that you’re body works right enough to make it happen. They weren’t confident that injectables that late in the process of this cycle would actually result in pregnancy. Also, I realized my right ovary did really well, but this cycle my left ovary So I decided against going through with another procedure and more needles this time, and did “timed intercourse” instead.

Two weeks later, the pregnancy test was negative. Again. It’s been eighteen months. I feel like I’m stuck in the same cycle of being disappointed over and over.

Since this was supposed to be my third IUI, I also discussed with my doctor about what we should start next, and we set up an appointment to get an IVF consultation next month. I can still do IUI in the meantime, but this is the next step on the journey, since I can only take femara three more times.

So yay for getting somewhere in the middle of nowhere.

And boo to my left ovary, the fact that IVF costs so much in the United States, and needles. But if we can do anything and get through it, we can do this.

Tune in next time on my “Trying to Become Parents” journey.

Sincerely, Babblesandbrains

Posted in Miscellaneous Shenanigans

House-hunting in a Pandemic

Posted on by babbles&brains

After five wonderful years, we are finally ready to buy a house. In the midst of this pandemic, we’ve been very cautiously keeping tabs on houses we like and with a realtor we’ve toured a few with covered faces, gloves, and disposable booties. I fell in love with a gorgeous 1950’s house and GUYS!!!!! It’s so precious I can’t wait to share about it but it’s still not ours. Yet.

After negotiating, our offer was finally accepted. We’re in a process. There’s inspections, discussions, escrow (learning about this all as I go), paperwork, closing, and then MOVING. I’m stressed that nothing about this process is in my control except being able to pay for it. I got maybe 4 hours of sleep in two days waiting to hear if our offer would be accepted on this precious vintage home. So I’ve been basically crawling in my skin all day from anxiety and forgot to eat breakfast this morning with coffee so I’ve been extra pacey hoping that the powers that be will let us get a house that is imperfectly perfect for us. There is a LOT more things that have to happen, and I need to CHILL OUT.

We’ve lived in a nice apartment for four years. I wanted a garden so badly, but nothing grows in our little yard in this apartment. Not enough light.

But this house! This house has so much natural light and its charming and so calming and I can’t wait to get out there and garden in that beautiful yard with adorable fruit trees and native plants and collect ALL the succulents and maybe a puppy (that’s MY plan if we don’t get preggo this year, hubby gives me eyebrows about it, but I need something to take on walks to get excess weight off, and he won’t let me take our cats). Also, if we are still quarantined, I would LOVE to work from home there, it would be so nice.

Anyway, I digress. We’re in the process of buying a house. It’s exciting, its stressful, it’s unknown. I’m taking you guys with me on the wild ride. As you can probably tell, I am emotionally invested in the house we put an offer on, and that’s a big “no-no” because all of the things that could fall through. But my heart and my hormones just don’t listen to reason right now. Hopefully it’s a sign that this cycle is a good one to conceive…

Monday is when we are getting the home inspected. Since it’s built in 1950, there could be plenty of things wrong with the house, and some things could definitely force us to not even have the chance to buy it. Or, give us the chance to get the house for cheaper than we offered. So that’s neat.

“Focus on where you want to go, not on what you fear,” is the quote I wrote in my bullet journal for May. So I’m trying to not be too optimistic or pessimistic about the whole ordeal. It could go any way, and I can’t do a thing about it. It will teach me something about houses in the end.

Does anyone know how difficult it is to take off fuzzy FLOCKED wallpaper (WHY does it exist)? There’s some interesting wallpaper choices in this house we need to get rid of, and I’d like to get it done and painted before we move in, because I just CAN’T do the fuzzy wallpaper. It’s a brown and mauve plaid, and they even put it on the closet door. I love soft things but that wallpaper…. Gross!

I’ll update you on Monday evening if I’m not in excessive tears.

Sincerely, babbles&brains